March 1st, 2010

froggy

Winter Olympics

Parris and I watched a fair amount of the Winter Olympics. 'twas okay. Some stirring moments, some excitement, drama, grace, all that.

Some of these sports are silly, though. I mean, really. Two man luge? The top guy lying on the bottom guy, both of them flat on their backs, careening down an ice chute? Why not eight-man luge? Just stack 'em up, keeping the stack together would be real exciting.

And really -- this one is going to get me in trouble, I know -- if you don't know who won until some judge holds up a card or enters a number on a computer, it's not a sport. Now listen. I am not saying it doesn't require incredible skill, grace, strength, what have you. I am not saying the participants are not athletes, even. I am certainly not saying this stuff should not exist. But it's not a sport. I mean, really. Ice dancing? Dancing is an art. Has been an art for thousands of years. Doing it on ice doesn't change that. And when it's Russians dressed up as faux Australian aborigines or Americans ice dancing a Moldavian folk dance, it's REALLY not a sport.

All these judged "sports" are too subjective. A real sport may require umps or refs, but you know who won when the contest is over. We didn't have to sit around after the SuperBowl saying, "well, the Saints scored more points, but the Colts attempted more long passes, so their degree of difficulty was harder, and the judges will certainly give Dwight Feeney points for that triple spin move, even though he didn't get the sack. It could be close..."

I propose a new sport for the next Winter Olympics. A REAL sport. Ice football. Played exactly the same way as real (American) football, except everyone is on ice skates. I mean, we have field hockey and ice hockey, why not field football and ice football? Just think of the excitement as Peyton Manning skates backward to get off the pass and those speed skaters on the D-line come flashing after him while his wideouts do spins and triple axels trying to lose the CBs... most exciting sport EVER!!!
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tiger

The Ides of March

So... March is upon us. The month when HBO will announce its decision on A GAME OF THRONES.

(Yes, I know, I know, it is not actually the Ides until March 15, but the phrase is so fraught with drama I could not resist).

I have absolutely no idea whether "March" will translate to "early March" or "the end of March." The decision could be announced today, for all I know. Or maybe they will make us all wait until March 31. The Ides... well, maybe not. I don't know if I can wait another fifteen days, and anyway that date has ominous connotations. "Beware the Ides of March," and all that. So please let us know before that, HBO.

From the start of this, I've told myself, "Don't get too emotionally invested in this, or you will be devastated if it doesn't go." Wise words, those. I'm a smart guy.

But easier said than done. I've failed. I am totally emotionally invested, and if HBO does indeed decide to pass, for whatever reason, I will be gutted.

So let's all hope I am soon doing the happy dance instead.